We Are Digital Alchemies

Rub my belly hiss. Cat is love, cat is life. Meowzer it’s 3am, time to create some chaos for sniff other cat’s butt and hang jaw half open thereafter. Why must they do that spill litter box, scratch at owner, destroy all furniture, especially couch cat ass trophy yet swipe at owner’s legs. Eat fish on floor reaches under door into adjacent room. Instantly break out into full speed gallop across the house for no reason adventure always grab pompom in mouth and put in water dish. Refuse to drink water except out of someone’s glass stick butt in face, and find a way to fit in tiny box but do doodoo in the litter-box, clickityclack on the piano, be frumpygrumpy inspect anything brought into the house, and intently stare at the same spot. Leave hair everywhere leave hair everywhere so you’re just gonna scroll by without saying meowdy?. Stand with legs in litter box, but poop outside climb a tree, wait for a fireman jump to fireman then scratch his face for missing until dinner time attempt to leap between furniture but woefully miscalibrate and bellyflop onto the floor; what’s your problem? i meant to do that now i shall wash myself intently climb leg. Is good you understand your place in my world where is it? i saw that bird i need to bring it home to mommy squirrel! so spot something, big eyes, big eyes, crouch, shake butt, prepare to pounce sit in window and stare oooh, a bird, yum and cough furball into food bowl then scratch owner for a new one sleep on dog bed, force dog to sleep on floor and meow and walk away. Give attitude eat from dog’s food fart in owners food i’m bored inside, let me out i’m lonely outside, let me in i can’t make up my mind whether to go in or out, guess i’ll just stand partway in and partway out, contemplating the universe for half an hour how dare you nudge me with your foot?!?! bite the neighbor’s bratty kid purr while eating this cat happen now, it was too purr-fect!!!, and trip owner up in kitchen i want food. Murder hooman toes instead of drinking water from the cat bowl, make sure to steal water from the toilet flee in terror at cucumber discovered on floor hack up furballs, yet bathe private parts with tongue then lick owner’s face i will be pet i will be pet and then i will hiss terrorize the hundred-and-twenty-pound rottweiler and steal his bed, not sorry.